The Raygun show recap...

My friend Joel and I got to see the Naked Raygun show on Saturday, December 22nd at Reggie's Rock Club in Chicago.

The show was a DVD release party, and we were one of the first 100 through the door, so we got free signed copies of the DVD. How cool is that?!?!?

The evening started out kinda slow, the doors opened more than an hour before the DVD was played, and the DVD was pretty long when you're waiting for a concert. Don't get me wrong, the DVD was cool, but I was there to see the band play. I had not seen the band play in about 13 or 14 years, so I was really looking forward to it.

After the initial wait was over and the DVD was played, it was time for the show to begin. The 33 year old in me wanted to stand in the back of the club back and watch the show from a safe distance, so that was where I started. Halfway through the first song, the 17 year old in me took over and I made my way into the crowd. I pushed and shoved my way up to the stage and stayed there for the entire show. It was a blast. I was in the front row, just a little to the right of center, directly in front of the Michael Stephens, playing the guitar. The band played all of my favorite songs, and the sound was tight and pretty polished. They played stuff off of all of their albums, and even played a cover of "Suspect Device", originally written by Stiff Little Fingers. It was a really good show, if you ask me.

Highlights for the night:
1. The show was insane, it was just way too much fun.
2. The club was nice enough and the sound was excellent.
3. We got free DVDs and I got to talk to the band, as well as shake hands after the show was over.
4. They played "Suspect Device" which I have never heard them play live.

Not so good:
1. Joel's glasses got accidentally knocked off and smashed right at the end of the show. That sucked. He also lost his ticket for his free DVD, but I begged the bouncer for another ticket and explained the whole situation. She took me over to the club manager, and he gave me another ticket, so Joel at least got his DVD. Thank you, Val Capone and thank you to the manager of Reggie's Rock Club.
2. I got mashed against the stage pretty hard for several hours. The pit was pretty intense, approaching "meat grinder" during some of the songs. My ribs are banged up and sore today. I have had bruised ribs many times, but they seem to heal slower as I get older, and it hurts to breathe a little today. I am sore, but it was completely worth it.

Naked Raygun!!!

After about 15 years, my favorite band from high school is back together and making music again. They have a DVD release party and a concert scheduled for Saturday night, and I AM GOING! I can't wait to see it. I wonder what all the punks and skinheads will look like 15 years later.

Thanks, Chris, for letting me know that the tickets were on sale!

The ice storm from last week

I took a really nice picture of the ice storm last week. This was made without a flash, late at night, with a 1.5sec exposure time, and no tripod. I got it all right, except the darn focus. I let it do the focusing, which was a mistake.

Row, row, row your bum...

Gently across the room...

Tonight I made my second purchase from Craigslist. I got a used rowing machine for $50. It is strictly manual, no electrics to speak of, but it is a durable model. I wanted something that I can do on nights when I either can't or don't feel like running, and this should fit the bill.

Other news: Karen and James and I drove to the southern end of town to watch the meteor shower tonight. Unfortunately, James was upset about sitting still in the van, so we did not get to see the meteor shower at all. Bummer. Maybe Karen and I will get to see it a little later this evening from the window.

Monthly update?

I have the best intentions about updating this blog often, I just never seem to do it. Here's the latest:

Craigslist: What can I say, it is the greatest thing since sliced bread. If you have the time to wait for what you want, you can find really great stuff for almost nothing. I am going to go look at a rowing machine in a few days that I found on the list. It was originally a pretty expensive model, but it is now a relic - just like I like them.

Craigslist does have its down side. You can accidentally find things you really don't need to have, like a 1972 Triumph Bonneville 750. The engine needs work, but it ran when it was parked fifteen years ago. I thought it was perfect! How cool would that be! An old bike that I can get for almost nothing, it needs work that I (and James) love to do, and it would be a really sweet bike once it gets rehabbed! I almost jumped on it until Karen reminded me that I actually need a spot to park my car. Maybe getting a motorcycle is a bad idea anyway, I might shoot my eye out. (If this makes no sense to you, it may be because it is a line from the movie "A Christmas Story".)

Next on the list of updates: I crashed my car into another car. I got cut off, and lane changed without looking. I bumped into a pickup truck in the next lane and it creased my car a little. There was no damage to the truck, but there was obvious damage to my poor civic. Oh well, life goes on. I can hardly justify getting my car fixed when it is eight years old and has almost 90K on it. Now my car has more character, or herpes, or something...

Craigslist and electrics

Karen said it best. My name is Fish, and I am a craigslist junkie. I gave up Youtube in favor of the massive junkpile that beckons from craigslist. I can surf for hours to look at all the stuff that people no longer want, need, or can afford. It's like a garage sale, but I never have to leave the couch. I like it.

Now, on to the electrics... James and I changed out four switches in the kitchen, dining room, and living room. Our lights now work independently, and there are no more "master switches" that you have to turn on to make the other light switches work - except for the ones by the front door... Maybe I will have to ask James to look at those switches tomorrow afternoon?

New Treadmill...

You may have already heard my story, but a few may have not heard it yet. I bought a treadmill off of "craigslist" last week for $50. It is less than ten years old, and it looked like it had pretty low mileage on it. It originally sold for about $4,500.00 when it was new, and it is designed for heavy duty running or light commercial use. When I got it, it did not run at all, and some of the electrics were pretty well toasted. I replaced a bad fuse, cleaned the motor and drive system up, replaced a bad fuse holder, and I also cut out and soldered past a badly toasted connector. I now have a very fancy treadmill that works fine for less than $60 invested.

I found out that this particular treadmill had a recent recall, because a few of the thousands that were sold had actually caught on fire. I called the service department to set up the recall and just as I was about to give them my address, I asked them what the recall was for. They said it was to cut out the toasted connector that I had already removed, so I opted to pass on the recall. No reason to bring a repair guy out here for nothing.

Tomorrow, the treadmill wax ($9) and the teflon dry lube ($6) are supposed to arrive, so I should have my new mill up and running by the weekend. My Dad is also coming out this weekend to help me install a dedicated power line in the basement for my new treadmill, so Karen and I can both run at the same time - until the old treadmill completely croaks.

I am pretty dorky, I get excited about resurrecting nice stuff for little or no money. I guess that is why I pick lawnmowers out of the trash, fix them up, and then sell them. Maybe I should start up a new business next summer collecting mowers and selling them on craigslist? I think it is about time James learned how to fix mower engines. He knows how to use a screwdriver (pronounced screwdriber) and his wrench turning skills could use a little work. He already knows how to change the oil in the mower, just ask him. My next book will be called "How to pay for college, one mower at a time."

My name is Fish, and I am a YouTube junkie...

I am officially addicted to youtube. If I am at home, and I am on the net, I am probably wasting time on youtube. I have see people laughing, people shocking each other with tasers and stun guns, exploding produce, car crashes, a tiny camera mounted on a childrens "geo trax" toy - playing "crazy train" while driving around the track. I have seen people experimenting with ipecac syrup (it makes you sick to your stomach, in a most unpleasant way, apparently). I even saw two guys beat each other up, repeatedly. You can see almost anything on YouTube, even some stuff you don't even want to see. It has it's own search engine, too. I even learned how to remove the "ink tag" that our local JC Penney left on my shorts after I purchased them. I managed to remove the tag in about thirty seconds, with no damage at all to my new shorts.

I think I am watching the beginning of the next generation of entertainment. I would totally buy a subscription to a TV station that would allow me to watch my favorite shows or stories about stuff that I want to see when I want to see it. Not to mention you can see tons of music videos any time you want to, since MTV is no longer relevant, and doesn't play videos any more. I would trade in my satellite dish any day for that kind of entertainment.

What do you think? Have you seen YouTube? Am I nuts?

Running Update: After almost three solid years of running, I have finally started doing "speedwork". This basically means that I have started running harder to try to increase the maximum speed that I can run. For years, I have been an advocate of running slow and easy, but the speed increases were very slow and disappointing, so I am trying something new. I still only run three or four times a week, but I try to run faster for part of those runs. So far, it seems to be working. I ran my first sub 7-minute mile last week. The down side of running fast is that it increases the likelihood of injury. So far so good, no problems to report. I will keep my fingers crossed.

James just saw a spider in the bathroom and very calmly told Mommy about it. Mommy saw it and yelled for me, with a note of urgency and fear in her voice, scaring James. James freaked a little and screamed like mad for Daddy, since he saw that Mommy was scared, now James may be a little afraid of spiders. I may have spoken too soon. Apparently, he was not too scared. He is yelling for me to come over there and wipe his butt. -I can't complain, wiping butts is way better than trying to gracefully get a poopoo out of underpants without soiling the rug.

BEWARE: THE SCARY SQUIRREL!!!!

Yesterday, James and his friend Darren were going to play in the back yard. As soon as they went out to the back yard, they came racing back saying "There's a squirrel in the back yard!!"

I was a bit surprised by this, but I wanted to check it out just to make sure everything was normal. It was not. There was a little squirrel following the boys out of the back yard, towards the garage. It was not stopping and running away, like a normal squirrel, it was actually chasing them across the back yard.

Jason (Darren's Dad) and I sent the boys inside the house so we could deal with the squirrel. We had to actually push the little squirrel out of the garage a few times so we could close the garage doors. It kept trying to come inside. When it was not trying to get inside, it was busy panting and shaking and looking stiff and wobbly. We were not sure if it was sick or injured, so we went inside and left it alone outside.

I told Karen about the little squirrel so she could watch out for it. I didn't want her to be surprised by a little fuzzy guy looking for a leg to climb up. Today, when I got home from work, Karen said, "There's a squirrel in the back yard, under the water faucet."

I looked in the back yard and sure enough, there he was. The little squirrel was panting and shaking and looking a little worse than the day before. I decided it was time to call for reinforcements, so I asked Karen to call the local animal control office while I watched the little squirrel pant for a few minutes. Note: When you call animal control, you actually get the Overland Park Police department. Karen told them what was going on, and we thought that they were going to send an animal control officer. Nope, they sent a real police officer to our house, at 6 o'clock in the evening, in a police car that was clearly marked as a police car. 6 o'clock is the same time that our neighbors all return from work to see the police car in front of our house, by the way. They drove very slowly past the house, wondering if they were going to see a "Springer moment" in action.

After a few trips around the back yard (the squirrel kept going through the fence) with the very nice police officer, I eventually caught the squirrel in a shoe box and gave it to the police officer to do whatever he thought should be done. He actually had no idea what to do with it at first, we were his first "squirrel call". I think he decided that he was going to take it to the animal control facility, or something.

Since the police car went away, three neighbors have asked me if everything is okay.
I answered that "All is well again.", and James says "The Scary Squirrel is gone now, the Police man took it."

In the name of the Father...

Last night, James and I were getting ready to go to sleep. I was playing the, "What is this?" game with him. I would point to a part of him, and he would tell me what I was pointing to. I point to his nose, and he said, "nose". I pointed to his ear, and he said "ear". I pointed to his lips, and he said "lips". I pointed to his teeth, and he said "teeth", but when I pointed to his forehead, he said "Father". He then said, "Father, Son, Spirit, Amen, now eat!"

I thought that was awesome. It's not just a forehead to him, it's Father. It certainly made me smile.

-He also told me later that it was his forehead-Father.

I am 17 again...

It's done. I installed the amplifier in my car, along with the subwoofer box. I now have a beatbox car again. The amplifier is the same one that I bought when I was in high school. It was in my friend Scottie's car for a few years, but he gave it back. Now I am using it again. It is really old and probably not as strong as it once was, but it works. It really makes me laugh when I drive my econo-box teenager mobile, thumpity-thumping away, with my loud muffler and my dark tinted windows. I feel like I am 17 again, except I can legally buy alcohol now.

Completely unrelated - I got carded tonight at Olive Garden when I asked for a glass of wine with my dinner.

Pimping my ride, garage sale style. (DORK WARNING)

I bought a speaker box with a functioning speaker in it for ten bucks at a garage sale. I had the amplifier in the basement from high school. All that was left was to go out and buy some power cables for the amplifier and some speaker wires. I found out that, sadly, the wires were going to be the most expensive part of my car stereo. I spent 50 bucks for some stinkin' wires. If it saves me from burning down my junk, it is worth the 50 bones. I just feel stupid spending that much money on a few pieces of copper wire.

Installation should take place some time next week, I think... I just have to figure out a way to control the amp without running an extra set of wires through the car. I want to be able to play the radio without the amp when James is in the car. Maybe I will just put a big circuit breaker in the trunk???

Yep, I am king dork.

You have got to see this, really.

For those of you who ever went to Showbiz Pizza, or Chuck E. Cheese, this may be one of the sweetest things ever to grace YouTube. The guy did a bunch of other songs as well.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xFVfelCJozo



Wow.

James the comic.

I tickle James a lot. His grin and his laughter are some of the most wonderful things I have ever witnessed. James was in the midst of being tickled for the umpteenth time by me, his father, when he decided that he had enough. This is exactly how it happened:

Fish: "I'm going to tickle you!"

James: "No Daddy, hee-hee, hee-hee"

Fish: "I'm gonna get you!"

James: "Run away!

Fish: "I got you, now I tickle! A-haaa!"

James: " No Daddy, no tickle. Knock it off, Lunchbox."





I have to say, it really worked. I stopped tickling him immediately. We both sat on the floor and laughed instead.

Computer fun!

Our computer has been crazy for a while now, and Karen has been mad at it (and me on occasion) quite frequently due to the computer's latest "new features". One of the old features is the "magic power button" that only works well for John, and "magically" makes Karen very mad. The PC needs a new power supply, it takes about 12 hours to warm up enough to actually let you turn the computer on. The power supply has actually been trying to poop out for many months. You normally have to tap the power button about ten times to get it to turn on, even when the power supply has had sufficient 12 hour or more warm-up time. The latest feature that it self-installed was the "magic shutdown timer". Last week, the processor was apparently overheating due to lack of air flow. It would run fine for about ten or fifteen minutes, then shut off abruptly. No warning, no error message, just abrupt silence and darkness. You had to use some pretty good time-management skills to get your mail, send your replies, check the weather, and download your pictures before the system shut off abruptly. Once we figured out (wild-guessed) that it really was an over-heating problem, I took the computer apart and removed what looked like a fuzzy grey squirrel living in amongst the internal bits. (James had a blast helping me take it apart and put it back together. I now need to hide all screwdrivers from James, so he doesn't dismantle the PC while I am sleeping.) Once I removed the squirrel, I had to wait the obligatory twelve hours for the "magic power button" to become operational again. James was the one who discovered that the computer was working again this morning since he punched the button and it fired right up for him, and he said "DADDY, I FIXED THE PAPUTER! DADDY I FIXED IT! THE PAPUTER IS FIXED, YAYYY!" James has apparently uninstalled the "magic shutdown timer" since he was the one who announced that he had fixed it. Thank you, buddy, for fixing the paputer. I am still wondering what the next feature will be. The PC is starting to remind me of my old cars, they used to let you me know I needed to add oil by turning on the reminder light that said "check engine" every 1,000 miles or so, since they leaked like they had been shot.

Karen is getting a new computer (A sweet little MacBook!!) for her birthday. (I already told her that she is getting the new computer because I was afraid that she was going to get really mad at the one we already have and go out and buy a new one before her new one actually arrived, in cthe event that the PC had some really fun new features up its sleeve.)

M.I.A.

I have been MIA for two weeks now, but I had good reason. For part of it. At least some of it, anyway.

1. I was in Indiana last weekend, and I didn't want post while I was visiting relatives.
2. The new Harry Potter book went on sale last Saturday, and I have been almost unable to put it down since I cracked it open Saturday afternoon. It's good, and it may be the last one. It is much better than the last two books so far, and I only have about 200 pages left to go. If the end is carp, I will be mad. Yes, I meant to type carp. (I think we have talked about this before, it's a James thing)
3. The newest version of guitar hero came out. That's right, guitar hero rocks the 80's is on sale right now, for all you dorks like me. There is nothing wrong with being a little dorky. I admit that I like playing guitar hero, and it is possibly the dorkiest thing I have ever seen. Pretending to play guitar by wielding an itsy-bitsy plastic guitar spells "dorky" in my book. It makes me want to play the real guitar, but unfortunately, I am a musical no-talent schlub. Those of you who have been witness to my fast and loud, yet oddly wretched, drumming will no doubt agree.

A new discovery about myself. I like red wine. I like it a lot lately. Not in a "Hi, my name is John, and I have a problem" sort of way, more like I want to try different types of wine and search for the "perfect" red wine. So far, I am still on the cheap end of the spectrum. The expensive end of the spectrum is a bit too much for me at this point. Until I get a better feel for good wine, buying the really nice stuff for me would be the equivalent of using super-expensive paint on wrinkled noteboook paper.

I will be a more frequent poster once I finish Potter, and once I get bored with the new guitar hero game. Maybe I just need a bit of red wine to bring out my inner author... Nah, I tried that in college and it came out like the emotional blatherings of a basket case. But, the amount of emotion did get me an "A" on every paper that I wrote whilst moderately inebriated, due to the amount of "feeling" that I put into each paper. True story, I am not kidding at all.

Plain white T's

Hey there, Delilah, you make we wanna jump out the window.

Dear radio stations everywhere,

Please stop playing the Delilah song. That horse is dead. Stop kicking it, alright? Thank you.

Enough said...

Carry on...

Smoke up, Stoner!

For the second time since I have lived in this area, I pulled up to a stop light and looked over at the car next to me and saw a high-school aged kid smoking pot. It was 7:45 AM, and this kid was smokin reefer from a pipe that would have made Cheech and Chong proud. It was massive, brightly colored, and probably held a giant pile of doobie. Wacky kids, I tell ya. At least he was a passenger, and not a driver.

On a completely non pot-related topic, I bought the new album from The Smashing Pumpkins that came out today, titled "Zeitgeist". So far, I really dig it. I have pretty much always liked the Pumpkins, and this one is classic Pumpkins. I pre-ordered the album on iTunes, so I got a bunch of other free stuff along with the album, including a few covers of Pumpkin songs by other bands. Pumpkins songs are just not Pumpkin songs without Chamberlain. It just does not work for me at all without the true master on the skins.

Just maybe?

We might move back to Indiana. I will be with the same company, so I will not have to worry about finding a job. More information as it becomes available.

Vacation was great, but it ended too soon. Now we are back to work, and I am ready for my next vacation. We found a really great way to make the drive from Chicago without hitting bad Illinois traffic, and without going the long way around through Indianapolis. It saved us several hours, and also about 140 miles. Good times!

Weekend's here!

I am actually taking a few days off of work, for the first time this year. I have taken a day off here and there, but I am actually being so bold as to string almost five days off together, to form what most people call "vacation". I have not taken much time off at all since December, so I am a tad overdue. I am going to work tomorrow morning a little early, and then I am planning on leaving very early, so I can get a good start on my weekend.

We are actually headed back to Indiana to meet the pregnant woman of our dreams, and to hang out with family. We have been trying to adopt a baby for quite a while now, just short of two years. It seems like the wait is almost over. I really hope this works out for everyone. We have already talked to her on the phone a few times and we get along well, so I think this will be a lot of fun. She seems very nice and I think we would all work together well. I have a feeling that I will be really nervous when I meet her. I really don't want to screw it up and have her think that I am a doofus, even though I am. When I get nervous, I get more chatty. This could be interesting, given my prodigious penchant for talking all the time even when I am completely comfortable. We are actually meeting her for dinner at our favorite pizza place, which is extra funny for me, considering the fact that I have been on a low-carb diet for two weeks now. I foresee a sleepless night in my future. (when you fall way of the wagon on a low-carb diet, you get really hot and sweaty for the next eight to ten hours, it makes sleeping horribly uncomfortable)

Karen and I are very excited to meet her, and we get to see our families during the same weeknd. It doesn't get any better than that, eh? . We are really looking forward to this weekend!

Now, if I can just get out of work really early tomorow, I will be in great shape! I don't want to pass through any semi-big cities (St. Louis) during any of the "rush" hours.

Oops, I crapped my pants. Thank you Alli!

I got this from the Dana's website, and you need to see it. It's about the diet pill Alli, and it is one of the funniest things that I have seen in a long time. Be warned, this is not work-safe, and it talks about poop A LOT.

http://angryaussie.wordpress.com/2007/06/20/miracle-diet-pill-with-teeny-tiny-side-effect/

The horrors of dieting...

I have been running more lately, and I am also on the diet wagon again. Running definitely saved my health, but it has also given me the feeling that I can eat anything in any quantity that I feel like. This has resulted in a slow weight gain over the last two years. I am physicaly fit, healthy as heck, but I am getting a little thick around the middle again. Two years ago, when I got healthy for the first time, I decided that once I crossed the line from a normal healthy weight back into the overweight category (according to the standard BMI charts) that I would get back on the diet wagon again and lose weight. I crossed the line last month, and I didn't magically sink right back under the mark, so I had to get back on the diet wagon. I am 5' 7" tall and therefore officially overweight at 160. I was at 163.5 on Sunday last weekend, so it was definitely time to get after it again. I am back under the mark again, but most of it is probably water loss, so I am going to stick with it for a while. No fries for me, thanks, I'll just have the salad and veggies. I detest dieteing because it makes me feel kinda sad all the time. Please excuse me if I am a tad grouchy or forgetful, I am probably just hungry.

Dookie story and guitar hero geekiness

WARNING - POOP STORY- SKIP TO THE NEXT PARAGRAPH IF YOU DON'T LIKE POOP STORIES. James was very excited to have company here last weekend, and it really showed. He wanted to show off everything in his life that he is proud of. James is in the end stages of potty training. It took James a lot of encouraging and praise to get him to use the potty when he had to drop a deuce. When he finally used the potty to poop, we were absolutely ecstatic. We hugged and kissed him, we gave him jellybeans, and we danced around like crazy people. We were very, very excited that we didn't have to clean another turd out of his underpants. James knows that he is really doing a good thing when he uses to the potty, and it si very exciting for all of us. On Monday evening, James went to the bathroom and dropped a deuce. James was understandably very excited about what he had just done in the bathroom. James started calling out, "Uncle Chris, come in here! Uncle Chris, come, come in here." Then James started yelling, "OH MAN, BIG POOP! WOW, LOOK AT THAT! BIG POOP!" His voice was brimming with excitement over his potty usage. Uncle Chris told him "That's great, James. I am very proud of you, but I don't think I want to see your poop." James was very understanding, and Karen and I were overcome with the giggles. James was right, it was a big poop, he was right to be proud. My son is cool.



I can play "Monkey Wrench" by the Foo Fighters on the "Expert level" at around 85-90% correct on Guitar Hero 2. I am a very big dork. I am practicing for the next chance I get to play at a guitar hero party. I might have to plan one of my own.

Shiny muffler

Here is my big ol' shiny muffler. Note the tiny pipe leading in from the back, and the huge opening sticking out in the front. Standing behind the car, I think it looks pretty good, and it really makes me laugh. I am actually starting to like Daddy's junk now that it has a little more character. Sound system upgrade is next, followed by motor - as time and money allow. Like I said earlier this week, if I can't do it for cheap, I probably won't do it at all. Craigslist, here I come.

I found a sweet bolt-on supercharger with intercooler for about 2K, so I just need to watch for the right one to pop up on craigslist. :)

When we got the car, we named it Aggie, after the chemical symbol Ag representing silver from the periodic chart of the elements. That name seems a little weird now. Maybe I need to change it to Argentum, instead of the shortened nickname. Nah, I'll stick with "Daddy's junk". That one is much funnier.

James and I were walking into the house after we got done playing with his remote control car, and I asked James what he wanted to do. He looked up at me with a huge grin and said, "Wanna play guitar, Daddy? Quick, take your shoes off! We need to go right now! Hurry up, we gotta go right away! Fast! Fast!" The whole time he was tugging on my hand to get me to sit down and take off my shoes. He makes it very hard to want to go to work in the morning, knowing all of the fun that I am missing out on while I am away.

James and the new tint.

Here is a picture of my freshly pimped ride, complete with the new "so dark they are going to get me arrested" tinted windows. I really love my tinted windows, I just hope I don't have to pull the tint off during a traffic stop while a policeperson watches some day. Next items on the list: nicer stereo if I can do it really cheap followed by nicer motor if I can also do that for cheap.

I just had new tires put on the car two weeks ago. I figured that the installers would be fairly careful about the inflation of the new tires, since tires are their main business. I figured wrong, the tire pressures were as follows: 25, 27, 34, 36. Accoring to the door frame, they are supposed to be 30, 29, 29, 30 - following the same order that I listed the other pressures. (30 in front, 29 in rear)

If you look really closely, you can see that James is actually inside the car. Please note, he is wearing a fairly brightly colored striped shirt, and you almost can't see him.

Work news: I have a trainee. I finally have someone that can be my back-up! I finally have the ability to take real vacations! (and possibly get promoted?) -The really funny part about this story is that I used to have my own office at the Dolton plant, but by the time I left the Dolton plant, I was sharing an office with two other people. Now that I am in Grandview, I am once again sharing the office that I once was the sole occupant of for the last two years. The guy that I am training has no office of his own. He was sharing an office out on the production floor with the supervisors. I was almost sharing my office a little while ago with yet another one on of my coworkers that actually had a single office, but it was really far away from all of the action in the plant. I had a chance at three people in my office again. That would have been funny.

The power of the van is strong with this one...

So far the van has gotten me new tires, a new muffler, and next week I get my windows tinted. If I had known that the van was so powerful, perhaps I would have caved sooner. Maybe I will get the bolt-on supercharger next week, right after the huge wing, mink fur seat covers, neon lights that flash to the beat from the stereo, a bumpin' stereo system, lower suspension, stiff springs, black alloy rims, a body kit, and fancy paint with lots of stickers. I definitely need a lot more stickers. The only stickers I have right now say: "RUN", and "13.1".

Our friends, the Danas, just got a minivan this evening. My condolences to Jason on the passing of his manhood, and my congratulations to Janelle on her new "sweet" ride. :)

To everyone out there who does not have a minivan, we know you are just jealous, go ahead and make fun of us. We know what cool is. Cool is electric doors and seating for seven with a low entry height and decent gas mileage. Awwww yeah...

Contest results and pimpin' my ride

CONTEST RESULTS

Thank you to all of the contestants for name that van! I really liked reading all of them. I have to say that the contest winner, i.e. the one that has the best chance of sticking is (drum roll please...) "The Silver Bullet". It applies for several reasons that I thought were all amusing. (The shot to the machismo, and the fact that it is not fast at all but very mildly resembles the bullet train.) Thank you to everyone who played along.

PIMP MY RIDE

My car, which used to be Karen's car, was in a sad state of neglect. It has needed 4 new tires for five years and a muffler for over a year. The long lead time on the tires was becaused the last set of tires were crap from the moment we got them. They gave very little traction on dry pavement, and none on wet or snowy pavement. They were Cooper Lifeliners, and I guess they were supposed to be decent tires, so maybe I just got a bad set? They were horrible. The muffler has had a gaping hole that has been steadily increasing in size. It was loud, but not horribly loud, so I let it go for a long time. I didn't mind the noise at all. The only reason that I replaced the muffler is that I was worried that the hole in the muffler was possibly directing the exhaust gases into the garage when I left the house. There is an air intake for the furnace from the garage, so it is easily possible to send exhaust into the house. Here's how the story goes:

I got up at 6:20AM to drop the car off at the tire store. I got there in plenty of time to make sure I was first in line so I could get the tires on and make it over to the muffler shop for the noon appointment that Karen made for me. It worked, I dropped off the car, walked home, then walked back at 10:30AM to pick it up when it was done. $500 later, I had a nice new set of tires that stick to the road like glue. Over to the muffler shop I went, right across the street. I dropped the car off and walked home. I went back much later (they finally got started on my car at 4PM) to look over the estimate and sign on the dotted line. They had a standard steel muffler for $85, and a polished stainless steel muffler for $90. I went with the $90 shiny one, street-racer pimp style. My car now has a 3-inch polished-tip exhaust, and it is kinda loud. It is a lot quieter than it was, but it is not as quiet as it was originally with the stock muffler. I think it's hysterical, and Karen thinks I am goofy. I started pimpin' my ride. Karen is getting the windows on Daddy's Junk tinted for Father's Day. I am not kidding at all. I wonder what's next...

Contest time!

It's time to play "Name That Van!" with our silver Honda Odyssey mommy-van.

Please submit your entry for the contest, and I will try to guess which one has the best chance at being permanent after the Memorial Day weekend.

My first two ideas are: "Bessie", due to the size of our massive chariot, and "Oddity", since it is funny and rhymes with the model name.

Any ideas?

The van, oh my...

We worked out the financial bits today, and the final deal is tomorrow. As of Thursday afternoon, we will be van owners. I am overjoyed. (insert sarcasm here) Yay.

The specifics: It is a 2004 Honda Odyssey EX with 25K on it, but it looks like new as far as I can tell. It is freakin' massive. This portly heifer-monster barely fits through the garage doors. We had to mooooove a bunch of stuff out of the way in order to get porky in the stall. It has fancy automatic climate control up front with rear A/C and heat controls in the back. It has keyless power doors on both sides, which is a pretty nice feature for rainy days. It drives nice, and the seats are much better than in the Ford. The stereo, however, is a disappointingly underpowered single disk player, but it has steering wheel controls, so the stereo stays where it is. (The Ford had a nice subwoofer in the trunk, I will miss that.)

The van is silver, exactly like Daddy's junk. We have matching silver "his and hers" Hondas. Barf.

I only have one legitimate complaint, it is not a 4x4. That is the one thing about the Escape that I really dug. It was like carrying a card that says "I am never going to be stuck in the snow, ever." I would like the van a lot more if it had 4WD. As it is, eh, it's Karen's pimpmobile, and hopefully she will love it. I will really enjoy having it on long trips back to Indiana, and it will definitely be nice for carrying visitiors and friends. It gets much better gas mileage than the truck, but it's sheer girth makes me proporionately look like a very small nerdly child driving Momma's big-ol car. I don't have issues with my stature, I just know what I look like.

Overall, I think it is a very nice van, and I think we got a good deal. I really hope Karen likes it. Maybe we will post some pictures tomorrow?

Gotta run, literally.

I am a loser.

I lost the battle. My Ford Escape (yep, it was supposed to be mine) is in someone else's hands right now, being examined for trade-in value, and Karen has a Honda Odyssey sitting in the parking lot where she works. We did not sign any papers yet, but if they give us a decent deal, we will be the sad owners of a minivan. Okay, okay, Karen will be really happy about it, but I will have loads of regret, I still like the truck. I came to this conclusion, we will lose about 3-5K on the deal, but in the end the retained value of the van may still end up being more than that of the Escape. Several years from now, it will all even out, I think... Not really, but it makes me feel better, and the mommy van will make Karen happy. As long as the van is a typical Honda and not a lemon, it could actually be a decent trade, all things considered. We shall see, I guess. We set a limit on what we are willing to spend, and I hope we will be able to stay there. Honestly, we will stay there or the Escape is coming home again tomorrow.

She better play nice from here on out, and she better get me something nice for our anniversary too... I get to have the next car! Waah!

I am thinking about a Subaru WRX for my next car... It will probably change, since it will be years before it happens, but that is the car I lke today. All wheel drive, decent motor, decent cargo space, and decent gas mileage.

You can run, but you can't hide... from your lack of sleep?

The next time you get less than three hours of sleep, it's a bad idea to go running. Conversely, if you know you are going to run the next day, try to get a decent night's rest. I stayed up until 2:15 or so talking to Karen, then got up at 5:05 to go running with Jason. Actually I tried to run with Jason, but it was more like I labored along intensely while Jason jogged very slowly to keep pace with me. I was a little off my game to say the least, actually it was easily the hardest/worst day of running I have ever had. Next time, I'll just let Jason go out on his own so he doesn't have to barely shuffle along to keep pace with me, or perhaps I'll get more sleep. It took me almost five miles to get loosened up enough to be able to jog anywhere near my normal meandering pace, and it hurt almost every step of the way. Just say no.

Other fun news - Karen has begun her next wave of tactics to try to get me to agree that we need a van. She told me that I must have be thinking about getting a van a lot to be able to talk to her about it so easily. All of this stems from the fact that she said she wanted to trade in "daddy's junk", and I said that the gas mileage was better and the repair costs lower for the junk than for the truck. She is resorting to subliminal messaging, and the jedi mind tricks, I think. I must be thinking about it, so I must agree soon. You are getting very sleepy, vans are good for your garage Obi-Wan. Come to the dark side of the dealership, it is you dessstiny.

(Thank you, Scottie for the inspiration!)

"Shrek the Third" and "Worlds of Fun"

It was a busy day. We started out our Saturday with a visit to Worlds of Fun, our local amusement park, for the Caravan Ingredients (the place that I work for) annual picnic. We had a blast, hanging out with the Dana clan and riding on all of the kiddie rides. One funny note, we (the parents) had to expain to the boys (Darren and James) that you can not hug each other while you are walking, or you will end up with skinned knees. James and Darren tried to walk and hug at the same time and ended up falling over and getting mild knee boo-boos.

James passed out cold in the car on the way home, immediately after we left the park. As soon as we got home, it became nap time for all of us. Post-nap, we ate a quick dinner and headed off to go see "Shrek the Third". It's funny, just like the first two. In fact, the whole movie is just like the first two. It's not new any more, but it is still entertaining. James loved it, but I don't think he understood many of the jokes. Somehow, being scared about being a father for the first time is not something he can really relate to. If you're a Shrek fan, go see it, you'll like it. The little Dronkeys (Dragon + Donkey) are very cute, as are the little Shreklings.

More on the van story: I still really don't want one, and Karen still really does. I think we should drive our cars until they become either unsafe, unreliable, or more expensive to repair than replace. Karen wants a van, regardless of what she currently drives, and thinks that we need a van for a family that may one day require two car seats and two adults. I am still hoping this minivan craving passes, but I think Karen may resort to using more "jedi mind tricks" on me to win this battle. She tried it once, but I didn't fall for it. I am not kidding at all, she really did. Ask her about it.

VW Eurovans are pretty cool, I must say. I really wonder why they aren't being imported any more. They aren't 40K, as Karen suggested in an earlier comment, they are in the same range as most of the other foreign vans. I also like the Toyota Sienna and the Honda Odyssey as well. Karen likes the Mazda 5, but I think it is kinda like buying the teenager's version of the minivan. The Mazda 5 is kinda tiny, and fairly inexpensive. It makes me think "pop can" when I see it. I think I say this because I currently drive the original "pop can, teenager-mobile" -my old Honda Civic. The new Civics are not in the same category, by the way... There's nothing wrong with it, but a seven year old Civic with a pile of miles and a couple of dings is definitely not your average "thirty-something year old's" car. I even taught James to refer to my car as "Daddy's junk". Every time James sees a silver car, he points and says "Daddy's junk!" Whenever James hears a car that needs a muffler, or even one of those funny "tuner cars" with the loud exhaust, he does the same thing, since my car has needed a muffler for almost a year.

At bedtime, just a few moments ago, James kicked Karen. Not a nice thing for a little boy to do. James apologized to Karen and gave her the requisite kisses afterward. Karen was trying to tell James that it hurts when you kick people so that he would not kick people any more. She was trying to explain it to him by having him recall one of his own boo-boos, and then she was going to tell him that it hurts when you kick people, just like your boo-boo did. It didn't turn out quite like it was originally intended, she said, "James, do you remember when you hurt your knee?", and he said "I no hug Darren while I walking any more, Mommy." At this point I fell over laughing. I couldn't help it, it was funny. I think any chance at a lesson was pretty much lost to my inability to control myself.

Since I have already written a novel, I might as well go the Forrest Gump route, and keep on talking. Here's the running update. I did 13.5 miles last weekend, and I am going for 18 tomorrow, starting at 5:30AM. Movie quote time: "I'm not right, in the head." I am looking forward to tomorrow's run. I really dig the long runs when the weather is nice. They are a lot easier than the short, fast ones during the week. I am still working on picking out my next race. Karen and I will probably be running in the "popcorn panic" at the annual Popcorn festival in Valparaiso, this fall. Orville Redenbacher was originally from Valparaiso, as seen in the commercials, in very fine print. They still have the festival every year, even though the operations have pulled out of Valparaiso, and Orville is long since dead. After the "panic" run is over, I am hoping to do a full marathon, possibly in New York, with Karen's Uncle.

Slacker!

I have been slacking on the posting a bit. Here is the next installment of pure unadulterated blogging bliss!

Karen has been working on me for a while about getting a minivan. (several months of pointing and sending me links to carmax) So, when I was having trouble thinking of a good present for Mother's day, I was actually considering buying a van. What the heck was I thinking?!?! Please, share your thoughts on this one. Should I commit testicular suicide, and get the van, or should I put my foot down quietly and pray she decides against it???

Karen read this post already, and told me, "What's the difference, you don't need your testiculars anyhow?" I am not sure what testiculars are, but it's a funny word, so I quoted it.

Please keep in mind that I am of the opinion that when it comes to my garage, there are no such things as "cool minivans". I like other people's vans, I just don't want one in my garage.

Post-race wrap-up

We (my brother-in-law Dave Clark, my uncle-in-law Bill Carpenter, and I) finished the race, upright, under our own power, and smiling. We all had a great time, and I would definitely recommend the Indianapolis Mini-Marathon race to anyone. It was a great course, the volunteers and the spectators were really fantastic, and the race was very well organized. I also must note that there are NO HILLS on the course to speak of.

Special thanks to Dave, Jamie, and Neil Clark for hosting the weekend's festivities, even though Neil had just gone through surgery two days before the race. (His last surgery! YAY!) You guys are awesome. I also want to say thanks to Bill for running along with me during the race. Long races are much easier when you have someone to talk to. Thanks again!

It was really great to see everyone (Kuglers, Clarks, Carpenters, and Kowalskis) last weekend, and we miss you guys a bunch. We hope to see all of you again soon. Our door is always open if anyone wants to visit us out here in Kansas City. I mean that in the figurative and literal sense. We often forget to lock the doors. :)

On the road again...

FIVE DAYS LEFT UNTIL RACE DAY!!!! -Only three days of work left this week.

I went running last night and I found that 6.5 miles now feels like a somewhat easy night. That is just plain weird. I am glad the "long run" training is over for a few weeks. I don't plan on doing anything over 14 miles for the next few weeks. I think my legs need a little break after the race coming up this weekend. Speaking of the race, I really want to get started. Actually, I really can't wait to see everyone in Indy again! I think the race is going to be a blast as well. I have heard great things about the Indianapolis Mini, that it is a whole lot of fun, that there are live bands and cheering fans all over the place. I still haven't decided if I am going to drink the free beer along the race course, or if I am going to wait until I am done running to have a beer, or perhaps I should say that when it is over, I may have some beersh...

I am hoping my somewhat embarassing, recurring "intestinal issues" do not occur during the race. For some reason, my intestines think it is time to "get to work" on some morning jogs. I don't really want to spend part of my race in a port-a-potty. One morning, while running with my friend Jason, we were forced to turn a planned 15 mile run into an 18 miler in order to get to a rest stop. The fastest way to get to a bathroom that day was to keep going a bit farther from home, and I knew I was not going to make it all the way back home without, shall I say, "major" problems.

THE TROLLEY RUN!

Karen ran the trolley run 4-miler today! It was a lot of fun for all of us. This is the first time that Karen has run an organized race, and she did it in grand fashion. She ran much faster than she thought she was capable of and she finished with a smile on her face. James and I are impressed and very proud of Mommy! This is a photo of Karen just after (10 seconds, maybe) crossing the finish line.

Bicycles and sore muscles...

James rode his bicycle tonight for the first time! I didn't even need to push him. He just sat down and started pedaling. It was such a cool moment. I was so proud and excited, he and I were both grinning from ear to ear. What a great day. The second picture is to show James' "cheeeese" pose. When we ask him to say "cheese", this is the pose he does every time. He loves to perform for the camera.

I went rock climbing last night, for the first time in three weeks, and I am really sore. My arms, shoulders, and back are a mass of angry muscles right now. I think I am going to down a few Advil and hit the hay. I don't have any really good pictures of me on the rock wall, and I am not nearly as good-looking as James, so I will refrain from posting a picture of me.

Funny James story

Karen had to work tonight, so I was hanging out with James alone tonight. We were kind of trapped inside since the weather was rainy and yucky again. I turned on "Caillou" which is one of James' favorite shows and sat him in my lap so we could watch a little TV together. I promptly fell asleep, and he let me sleep until the show was over, when he turned around and picked up my face to look at him and said, "Wake up daddy, ya lazy bum, Caillou is over. Turn it on again, please." That alone made me smirk, since I am the one who taught him the "lazy bum" bit. What he did immediately afterward made me really laugh. He pretended to pick up a piece of popcorn from an imaginary bowl in his lap and feed it to me. He told me what he was doing, "I feed daddy popcorn, mommy made it." -he even made the "crunch, crunch" sound for me as I pretended to chew the imaginary popcorn. We sat and watched a different episode of Caillou, and pretended to eat popcorn for the next thirty minutes. James even pretended to drop the pretend popcorn bowl on the floor, making a "big mess", which made him say "Oh, doughnuts!" and then laugh hysterically.

Since you can't say bad words in front of little kids, somehow I made up "Oh, doughnuts!", and James really thinks it is hysterical.

I'm baaaaaack!

I can run again! Yippeee! Woo-hoo!! YAAYYY!!!

I ran today without leg pain! Not only did I run today, but I ran fairly hard! I am really hoping this keeps up so I can finish the half marathon in Indy without turning my race into a very long walk.

This is really a good thing, I was fairly depressed the past two weeks becuase I thought I had really done some damage that was going to take weeks to heal. I am elated to find out that I should be able to run the race in Indy!

We (I ran with two other people today) ran the official "Hospital Hill Half Marathon" race course today as a training run. By saying that we ran hard today, I am understating quite a bit. We finished the hilly 13.1 mile course in 1:58:53. We really ran way too hard for a long training run. This was pretty close to (or right at) my race pace for most of the race. I am happy to report that I found out today that I am capable of a two-hour half marathon. I really didn't think I could do it, but I proved myself wrong.

Wednesday night, pretzels and frosting...

James is in bed, Karen is at work, and I am still sadly unable to run. So, here I sit eating pretzels dipped in strawberry frosting. It's actually pretty good, really. I only ate a few, as I am afraid to eat lot this week since I can't exercise much.

James and I walked over to the neighbors house yesterday after I got home from work and I rode their pint-sized 60cc motorcycle around their yard. It was a blast, even though I am sure that I was way over the weight limit. It probably looked something like "fat man in a little coat". I'm still a kid apparently. James said that he wants to ride with me on the motorcycle next time. I am not ready for that, the thought of him riding with me scares the bejeezers out of me.

James is the coolest kid ever. He loves to helps us out, no matter what we are doing, and he is even starting to listen to us when we ask him not to do something. He helped me change the oil in the car tonight, by tapping on the oil cans as I poured them onto the valve cover, making a "big mess", which made James laugh hysterically. I then changed the oil in the lawn mower, and James helped me by holding the handle of the mower, testing my pouring skills again by making the mower a moving target. Same result, "big mess", followed by more hysterical giggling. I don't mind cleaning up the messes, at least he is interested.

As James gets older, I find that it is a little harder to make him get the giggles each night at bedtime. I usually have to find novel ways each day to make him laugh until he gets the giggles, occasionally followed by the hiccups. It's really a challege some days. For instance, the other night, James was brushing his teeth and accidentally gagged himself with the toothbrush. I told him to be careful so that he doesn't make himself go, "blaaaaahhhh!". He thought that was the funniest thing ever and could not stop laughing, even after he got the hiccups, which made me laugh even harder. It didn't work half as well the next night, so I had to switch to singing loud nursery rhymes, way off key (as though I had a choice) and making funny faces to get the desired effect. I thought that the "blaaahhhhhh!" should have gotten much more mileage, especially since it made me laugh too.

Vanity is horrible, apparently...

I really did it. I actually hurt myself while ogling myself. Here's how the whole sad story:

While I was rock climbing last week, I was told by a stranger that I had runner's legs, so I decided that I would try to see what that looked like. When I went downstairs with my running shorts on, getting ready to run my nightly training run on the treadmill, I stood on my tiptoes, on the edge of my treadmill. I was trying to see what it looked like when my calves were flexed, as though I was on the rock wall. Well, I saw what they looked like for just a second or two before the pain set in. I was trying really hard to flex my calves and ended up pulling/straining a calf muscle. That's right, I hurt myself checking me out. What a dork. I have been unable to run without major pain for about a week now. I have been taking time off to let it heal up before I do more damage, stewing the whole time in my own idiocy. I love to run, and I have benched myself by checking myself out. To say that I am sad is a real understatement. Giggles are appropriate, please feel free to call me a goon. :)

Here is the main reason that I am sad about my sore leg: I am going to run the Indianapolis half marathon on Cinco de Mayo. I have trained for this race by running hundreds of miles (500+) just to get ready for this race. If I miss the race because I was ogling myself I will be very upset. Not only did this interrupt my training, it potentially jeopardized my ability to finish. I know that I can run the distance if I am healthy, I have gone much farther as recently as two weeks ago. It is because this is the big race of the spring that have been planning for. This race I am going to run with friends and family. It's not just the normal go out and run weekend, this one means something to me. If I push it and try to get back to running too fast, or if I manage to somehow re-injure the leg, I may be walking a very long race in May. Fingers crossed!!

Saturday night, right before Easter

I just found out that I am going to meet my half-brother, Andy, Memorial day weekend. I have been wondering about him ever since I found out about his existence. Actually, when I found out about him, I spent a lot of time wondering what he would be like. When I was out in public, I found myself wondering if I had already met him, or if I knew him. It's pretty cool that I have talked to him a number of times and found out that he is a lot like me. He is nice, technically minded, looks a little like me, (the lucky devil) his life has actually paralleled mine a bit, we share a lot of the same interests, and I really can't wait to meet him. It's only a month away, but I wish it was going to be tomorrow. He is going to be at my Grandmother's 80th birthday celebration, and what a party this is going to be!

Long run day...

Being a sloth for the first thirty years of my life definitely shaped the way that I am today. For instance, I have been running for several years in an attempt not to return to the sloth that I was, and I have enjoyed moderate success. It would probably be a foregone conclusion that someone who runs a lot would at least be mildly athletic, but I never thought of myself that way. Not at all, in fact. I still think of myself as the fat kid. I just can't seem to let it go. I guess it is fairly understandable that during the only time in my life when people were constantly brutally honest, as little kids are, I was constantly ridiculed for being on or over the edge of morbid obesity. After three years, my self-image finally changed just a little for me this past weekend. I decided that I was going to run a race with some friends, the 43.5 mile Brew to Brew relay from Kansas City, MO to Lawrence, KS. Not only did I decide to run in the relay race, I decided to run the first half of it with one of my friends. Yep, you read that correctly, we ran a little over 22 miles last Sunday, April 1st, 2007. We didn't run fast, but we finished upright, and were able to leave under our own power. Oddly, I really didn't even get sore afterward. It was a personal victory for me that let me feel like I was at least a little bit athletic for the first time in my life.

Why is this important? It wasn't a life-altering moment, but it was definitely a good feeling for me. I don't think I am competitive, but I am constantly trying to figure out exactly where I "fit in" in realtion to other runners, and I think I figured it out. I am not fast and I know that I never will be, but I can endure. I really like that. I was glad that I had the courage to try to run the race, and I am ecstatic that I was able to complete it. Yes, I walked a few times, and I was tired at the end, and I am fine with that. I may not be an Olympian, but I can run. I like that.

While I am being a bit introspective and thoughtful, I shall share a bit of my other random thoughts of people who have a profound effect on my life. This is not the full list by any stretch, merely the two that pop to mind right now.

Thank you, Grampy, for making paper airplanes with me. You taught me that it only takes a piece of paper to learn how to fly, without ever saying a word. I hope I can teach that to my son.

Thank you, Karen, for helping me pursue my hobbies. You really support me, and I really appreciate it. I can't begin to tell you how great it makes me feel to see you and James at the finish line.

p.s.- sorry I wasn't very witty tonight. I actually had a lot of funny thoughts, but I left them out on purpose.